


Little Do You Know

by Srishti13



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), Chaennie - Fandom, Kim Jennie - Fandom, Park Chaeyoung - Fandom, Rojennie - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-01 09:49:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16282334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Srishti13/pseuds/Srishti13
Summary: Falling in love is a beautiful feeling but only if the person that you love loves you back. Park Chaeyoung learnt this the hard way





	1. Chapter 1

Why do people fall in love?

Is it because of their vanilla-scented hair?

The way they smell?

Their captivating eyes?

Their pointed nose?

Their alluring lips?

The way they dress?

Or is it because they understand you more than others could?

The way they take care of you?

The way they sing for you when you have trouble sleeping?

And the way they smile because of you?

 

I guess people have different reasons why they fall in love - they either fall in love because of someone's physical appearance or because of their beautiful heart. Either way, it is still love. Unfortunately, loving someone has consequences. They either love you back or..

They don't.

 

And that is the most painful consequence of loving someone.

 

I met someone a few years back and I fell for them in an instant. It was so hard acting like I wasn't feeling anything towards them because I don't want to ruin the relationship I have with them, and that is friendship.

I have been loving that person ever since I started my training at the agency (even until now that it was announced that we're debuting soon). At first I thought it was just an ordinary "girl crush" thing but I didn't realize that it was already more than that. My simple admiration for her got deeper but I did not know what to do about it so I just let myself feel it.

I tried telling her how I feel but every time I do, she'll do some things (like telling everyone how proud she is to be my friend when I am performing in front of them during evaluation) that will make me change my mind. It wasn't really my intention to keep this from her forever but knowing that she only sees me as a friend prevents me to do so, and that pains me a lot.

Although I've always wanted her to know how I feel, there's still a part of me saying that I should just keep it to myself or just forget that I have feelings for her.

Will she love me back if I confess to her?

What if she doesn't feel the same?

What if my confession will change how she sees and thinks of me?

What if she'll despise me and wants me to stay out of her life forever?

What if...what if she'll regret that she met me?

 

These are the questions that keeps running back and forth in my mind. Questions full of what ifs and just the thought of it makes me want to hit my head against a hard surface until I forget everything, even my love for her.

 

To be honest, I really don't know what do. I'm confused and hurt at the same time. I just wish that all my what ifs will be answered and just focus on the what is.

 

And I wish that whatever happens, she'll still accept me like how she accepted me to be part of her life.


	2. One

Chapter 1  
“Just cause I learned how to live without you doesn’t mean that I ever really wanted to”  
For the members of blackpink, the Korean girl group that had taken the world by storm, getting a vacation was definitely not something they were used to. So when their boss YG called them to his office to inform them of his decision to let them have a month long break, as a reward for all their hard work, the girls were thrilled.  
“I am going to start packing right away” The makane Lisa announced on the drive back to their dorm.  
“Me too!” Rosé exclaimed from the backseat “It has been years since I went home to Australia.” she sighed  
“Slow down we still have a hectic month ahead of us before the holidays commence” Jennie reminded everyone.  
“I have no idea how I will be able to focus this month, or if I will be able to focus at all!” Jisoo said “The excitement is too overwhelming”  
“I know Unnie!” Lisa agreed “I hope that this month flies by.”  
And so it did. The day of their vacation arrived in no time and all the four girls were ready for their well earned break. But before parting from each other’s company for a month, they decided to have a ‘meat party’ which they organized themselves under the guidance of Jennie, or as Jisoo liked to call her ‘Jendeuk Ramsey’  
“Ah Lisa! Be careful, you nearly dropped the salt container” Jennie yelled   
Lisa laughed nervously “Sorry Unnie”  
Jennie smiled “its fine. Just be careful” she took the salt from Lisa “I will miss you guys”  
“Oh look Jendeukie is getting emotional” Jisoo snickered as she cooked the rice  
“Ah nothing like that!” Jennie said hugging Jisoo “It’s just that we haven’t been apart for so long over the past six years”  
“Be honest you will miss me the most, won’t you Unnie?” Lisa said joining in the hug  
“Yah Lalisa! The meat will burn keep an eye on it” Jisoo said  
Lisa pouted ‘You are so mean” Jisoo snickered and Jennie giggled. Yep she would miss her band mates for sure.  
“What’s up with chipmunk?” Lisa said while turning the meat “she hasn’t come out of her room for hours.”  
Jennie’s eyes turned towards Rosé’s door  
“Is she sick?” Jisoo asked in a concerned tone  
“I’ll go check” Jennie said “Jisoo Unnie please keep an eye on Lisa”  
“Fine” Jisoo sighed as Lisa clung to her “No Nalalisa! Ppoong” she announced as Lisa laughed  
Jennie walked over to Rosé’s door while whistling a soft tune and placed a gentle knock on her door. On getting no response she called out “Rosie! You awake?” This time Jennie heard soft sobs in response  
“Rosie…” her voice softened “I’m coming in”  
Jennie gently pushed open the door and saw the younger girl crying softly on her bed with her head in her hands. Jennie’s heart ached as she locked the door and embraced the crying girl.  
“What’s the matter?” she asked softly as she stroked her hair “you can tell your wifey”  
Rosé cried on Jennie’s shoulder as the older girl’s grip around her tightened  
“I…I can’t go home” Rose said before breaking down once again  
“What? Why?” Jennie asked cupping her face in her hands.  
“My parents have to travel out of the country on a business trip and my sister Alice isn’t back from her hostel yet either.” She wiped the tears off her cheeks “So I can’t go home to Australia”  
“Oh Rosé” Jennie placed Chaeyoung’s head on her bosom and softly stroked her hair  
“Unnie! Dinner is ready” Lisa called out from the kitchen  
“We are coming” Jennie responded. She turned to Rose and gave her a soft smile “Come on” she said “wash up and eat something. We have made your favorite kimchi fried rice” she smiled “I made it myself for you, just the way you like it.”  
Rose looked up towards Jennie and slowly nodded.  
“Don’t worry we will discuss this over dinner. Everything will be alright”  
***************************************  
“Oh Rosie!” Lisa ran to her best friend and hugged her tightly when Rose finally came out of her room. “Jennie Unnie told us what happened. Please don’t be sad. We’ll figure something out” she kissed her cheek.  
“Did you talk to your parents? Can’t they postpone their trip?” Jisoo asked patting her head  
“No. They said its urgent work. It can’t be helped”  
Jisoo gave her a comforting smile “Don’t worry they can always come visit you in Korea.”  
“Yes I know. It’s just that I was really looking forward to going home” Rosé started tearing up again as Lisa guided her to the dinner table where Jennie was setting all the food.  
“We will talk to ‘Sajangnim’ I am sure he will let you extend your winter holidays a little so you can go home.” Jisoo said putting an arm around Rosé’s shoulder  
“Are you sure he will agree?” Chaeyoung asked the older girl as she sat beside her  
“I’m pretty sure he will. We don’t have anything scheduled after our holidays, as of now, so if we talk to him soon I’m sure he will understand”  
To all the girls’ relief a soft smile now rested on Chaeyoung’s lips.  
“Okay then! I’ll write to him tonight!” she said a sparkle in her eyes  
“See I told you it’ll be alright” Jennie said as she served everyone dinner  
“Chipmunk why don’t you come home with me to Thailand, Jisoo Unnie is coming with her family as well. My parents have always treated you as their own daughter I’m sure you’ll have a nice time there. We can visit lots of places!” Lisa’s eyes shone as she sweetly put across her offer to Chaeyoung who smiled sadly  
“I would really love to Lisa, but I don’t have my visa and sadly it can’t be made overnight”  
Lisa’s face fell “I see. So will you be here by yourself?”  
Rose smiled “I suppose I don’t have another choice but don’t worry I’ll be fine. There’s work to…”  
“No wait hold on” Jennie interrupted the younger girl “what makes you think that we will let you stay here by yourself?”  
“Uh well…”  
“Jisoo unnie and Lisa are going abroad but I’m not going anywhere. Come stay with me and my family. They adore you as well.”  
Rosé looked at Jennie while biting her chili, then said “It’s really sweet of you unnie but I wouldn’t want to be a burden. Moreover it’s your family time and I…”  
“Are you not my family then?” Jennie interrupted again rather sternly intimidating not just Rosé but Lisa and Jisoo as well who were silently listening to their conversation while enjoying their meal  
“Well…I…are you sure?”  
“Why not? My family is busy with their business as well and I don’t have a lot of plans with them. So we both can spend time, go around and shop, it’ll be good for us as well”  
“Okay then!” Rose exclaimed with a smile “let’s do it!”  
“Yes!” the makane announced and raised a glass of champagne “to Blackpink”  
Her unnies smiled and followed suit “To Blackpink!”

*******************************************************  
“Goodbye Chaeyoung-ah, have fun, take care and call us daily please! We will miss you” Her mother’s words replayed in fourteen year old Park Chaeyoung’s mind as she waited for the elevator in the YG entertainment building. It was her first day and she was to meet her ‘sajangnim’ YG himself.   
She began tearing up while waiting for the lift. It had only been a week since she arrived in South Korea from Australia and she was already missing home and feeling lonely in this foreign land.   
As the lift doors opened she bowed her head to hide her tears and stepped in.  
“Hey are you new here?” A young girl who was already in the lift said as soon as the metallic doors shut  
Chaeyoung looked up to meet mysterious brown eyes smiling at her “Yes I just arrived. It’s my first day here” she said softly  
“I see” the girl offered her hand “I am Jennie Kim. I have been a trainee here for three years now. What’s your name?”  
Chaeyoung took the girl’s hand “Park Chaeyoung.” She smiled  
“You play the guitar I see” Jennie said eyeing the instrument Chaeyoung was carrying  
“Yeah” Chaeyoung responded  
“Will you play it for me? I love hearing people play the guitar”  
“Of course, why not”  
“You have an Australian accent! Are you Australian?”  
“Yes I grew up there!” Chaeyoung said happily  
“Oh wow I studied in New Zealand for five years!”  
“Whoa really!? That’s amazing. I was actually born in New Zealand”  
The metallic doors opened and Jennie began to leave “Meet me at lunch” she said turning around “I’ll show you around. It’s your first day I’m sure you could use a friend” she smirked  
“Certainly.” It was the brightest Chaeyoung had smiled that week.  
********************************************************************  
Next day  
“We are here!” Jennie hopped out of the car “Welcome to the Kim residence” she said helping Chaeyoung out of the car   
“Thank you” Chaeyoung said taking Jennie’s hand as they walked in together. Seeing the house sure bought back memories.  
“Omma! I’m home!” Jennie announced “Kai!” A dog ran to Jennie and she picked it up giggling   
“Welcome home!” Mrs. Kim hugged her daughter and gave a smile to Chaeyoung who bowed respectfully  
“Thank you for letting me stay here Mrs. Kim. I promise I won’t cause any trouble”  
Mrs. Kim laughed and embraced Chaeyoung “You haven’t changed my dear.” She cupped Chaeyoung’s face in her hands. “But you sure have grown tall”  
“She is always like that” Jennie laughed “Come I’ll show you to our room” Jennie glanced at Chaeyoung  
“Yes you two freshen up. Come down for lunch in half an hour, it’s nearly ready”  
“Yes omma”  
Chaeyoung picked up the bags and followed Jennie to their room. Jennie giggled holding a door open as she watched the younger girl stumble up the stairs with the bags “Sure you don’t need help with those?”  
“Nope trust me, I’ve got it” Chaeyoung grunted as she finally made it to the door   
“Welcome to Jennie Kim’s room” Jennie said looking at a mesmerized Chaeyoung   
“It’s been ages since I have been here!” she admired Jennie’s soft toys neatly arranged on a shelf.  
“You haven’t come over that often have you?” Jennie said fishing clothes out from her closet  
“No I don’t think so. You invited me over often during our trainee days but I haven’t really been here since our debut. ”  
“Well” Jennie said walking towards her “you are here now so let’s make the most of it” she handed her some clothes “wear these for now you can unpack later. I’m starving” she smiled and walked off to freshen up.  
********************************  
‘It’l be fine. It’l be fun. Jennie Unnie is sweet and caring we’l have fun’ Rosé remembered assuring herself the morning she and Jennie were to go to Jennie’s place, but now as they lay in Jennie’s bed post lunch leaning against each other watching a movie Chaeyoung felt her worse fears come alive ‘no’ she told herself as Jennie rested her head on her shoulder ‘It’s been three years. I am a mature woman now who can…’  
“Hey Rosie” Jennie interrupted her thoughts “Do you ever think of our trainee days”  
“The trainee days? Yes, why?” Rosé asked rather nervously  
“We used to do this so often back then.” Jennie sat up looking at the younger girl with a soft smile “I miss this. It’s like we grew apart after our debuet”  
Chaeyoung’s heart raced “Oh. Yes I guess we did. I’m sorry”  
“Why are you sorry? It’s not your fault we just got too tied up in promos and photoshoots and all that.”  
A sad smile formed on Rose’s lips “Yes. It was bound to happen”  
Jennie looked at her sadly then leaned back on her shoulder refocusing on the movie “But now we have time to reconnect. So let’s make the most of it shall we” Jennie’s eyes shone as she looked up to meet Rose’s gaze  
“Yes” Rose’ said “Let’s relive the old days”  
************************************************************  
“Wah Onni! Your room is so pretty” Park Chaeyoung announced as she entered Jennie’s room for the first time  
“Chaeyoung-ah! Come look at my soft toy collection!”  
“Woah Daebak! That teddy bear is so pretty!” Jennie laughed at the enthusiasm of the younger girl. It had barely been a week since they had met but Jennie had decided to bring her home mainly because she knew how homesick the new trainee was but also because she had grown fond of her and wanted for them to be friends.  
“Here you go girls” Jennie’s mom entered the room with two bowls of ice-cream “help yourselves”  
“Mrs. Kim thank you so much” Chaeyoung bowed suprising both Jennie and her mother  
“Oh my what a sweet girl. Don’t worry dear feel at home here. You must be missing your family”  
A grim expression replaced the enthusiasm on Chaeyoung’s face as she began tearing up “Yes I do”  
Just as she was about to break down Jennie caught her hand “Omma Chaeyoung plays the guitar beautifully would you like to hear it”  
“Yes certainly”  
“Chaeyoung-ah! Will you play for Omma”  
Enthusiasm was back on the younger girl’s face “Yes certainly! Do you want me to play that song you really liked?”  
“Yes yes!” Jennie cheered as Chaeyoung reached for her guitar she had bought along to practice  
“Just close your eyes and listen to her omma.”  
Jennie’s mom smiled and obeyed her daughter as Rose’ began singing. She sang a short verse but that was enough to win over her new found friend’s mother. But more importantly Chaeyoung kept glancing at her new friend and watched the soft smile on her face as she listened with her eyes closed bobbing her head to the tune of the guitar  
“My that was beautiful Chaeyoung. You are really gifted. What was that song called?”  
“’She will be loved by Maroon 5’ I really love that song. It’s Jennie Onni’s favourite too”  
“Yes and you make me love it more” Jennie was still mesmerized “sometimes I feel like you are singing it to me”  
“Oh thank you” Chaeyoung softly blushed smiling brightly looking away. Her heart fluttered on hearing Jennie say that. She wanted to say something to Jennie but hesitated.   
“Well you girls have fun I’d better go. Chaeyoung if you need anything don’t hesitate to ask”  
“Yes Mrs. Kim”  
“Chaeyoung-ah! I just had the best idea! Let’s sing duets on the guitar” Jennie suggested excitedly  
“Onnie that’s a great idea! Let’s do it” And just like that the two girls spent the rest of the day laughing and living their life to the best. Little did the young girls know then that their lives would change forever when they grew up. Little did the girls know that their friendship would change forever after that very day.


	3. Two

"You're still the one I'm after all this years..."

 

Rosé woke up to sound of her phone buzzing. It was already seven o'clock in the morning and the sun is already giving off too much heat and light around the city of Seoul. Feeling a little bit groggy, the girl tried to reach for something around her to block the sunlight from hitting her face but unfortunately, she found nothing. Instead, she felt a human figure sleeping beside her covered in a warm white blanket.

She opened her eyes, rubbing the sleep from it and looked around her surroundings. That was when she realized that she's not in her room: neither her room in their dorm nor her room in Australia, but in Jennie's room and on Jennie's bed.

She turned to her right and saw the older girl sleeping so peacefully with her messy hair on the pillow. Rosé smiled admiring the beauty of the older girl. She removed a few strands of the older girl's hair and tried to tuck it in behind her ear when the latter girl slowly opened her eyes, smiling.

"Good morning" Rosé greeted the older girl softly with a smile "Did I wake you up?"

Jennie smiled. She shook her head no and greeted the tall girl "Good morning hubby"

"How was your sleep?" Jennie added.

"I had a very peaceful sleep" the younger girl said but then she suddenly smirked "but not until you started snoring" Rosé laughed.

"Hey, I don't snore Chaeyoung-ah. Of all people, you should be the first person to know that." the older girl laughed as she slapped the taller girl's arm.

The taller girl laughed at the older girl's reaction as she caressed the spot where Jennie slapped "Wow, for a small girl like you, you sure do slap hard eonni." Chaeyoung teased the girl beside her. "What do you think our fans' reaction if they found out that the great Jennie Kim snores? Hmm?" she added earning another playful slap from the older girl.

"I hate you, Chaeyoung-ah. Stop teasing me." Jennie cooed showing her aegyo as she pouted and hid her face behind a pillow.

"Aww, my wifey's such a baby." Chaeyoung smiled reaching for the pillow and removed it from covering Jennie's face. She cupped the older girl's cheek and smiled "It doesn't really matter whether you snore, you drool or whatever it is, you are perfect to me Jennie."

While Rosé was internally cursing herself hoping for the ground to swallow her alive, Jennie froze at her friend's sudden compliment. Sure, Rosé compliments her members all the time, most especially her, but being in a situation where you're lying on the same bed, your faces only a few inches apart and both your eyes were locked with each other, then that's a whole lot different story. 

No one dared to break the eye contact. Rosé's still cupping Jennie's cheek caressing it lightly using her thumb while the other girl's contemplating on what should she do.

"Girls, wake up! Breakfast is ready." Jennie's mother enthusiastically announced barging in her daughter's room causing the girls to look away from each other. Rosé sighed and internally thanked Jennie's mother for barging in while Jennie groaned for her mother's sudden appearance.

"You scared us, eomma. You could've just knocked." Jennie whined as she sat up looking at her mother.

"Why would I knock in my own house, my dear?" Jennie's mother sarcastically said and walked towards the bed, specifically on her daughter's side "Now get up and fix yourselves. Do not let the breakfast to wait for you." her mother demanded slapping daughter's leg.

"Ah eomma, that hurts!" Jennie playfully whined using her aegyo voice which made her mother cringe.

"Oh Jennie, you can't use that on me. Now get up! Faster! Faster!" she pulled her daughter from the bed and playfully pushed her towards the bathroom "Wash your face please. You don't want to let pretty Chaeyoung see your face filled with your drool right?" her mother teased causing Jennie to groan louder.

"I hate you eomma!" Jennie yelled from the bathroom closing th its door.

Jennie's mother chuckled shaking her head "That woman still acts like a three-year-old little girl"

Rosé just sat there on the bed silently watching the mother and daughter's cute interaction. Noticing Rosé's quietness, mother Kim spoke "Chaeyoung-ah, why don't we go ahead downstairs and have our breakfast. You know how my daughter moves so slowly." Jennie's mother stretched her right arm leading Rosé outside her daughter's room "Let's go" Chaeyoung just nodded and smiled.

"Jennie-yah! Don't take too long! Your father might eat all the pancakes!" the woman shouted before closing the bedroom door not minding to wait for her daughter's response.

 

***

Rosé was quiet half way their breakfast. She only speaks when either Jennie's mother or father asks her something.

"Chaeng, my dear, I know how much you love to eat so just grab anything you like okay. Please don't be shy." the mother of the family offered which made Rose smiled. 

"Ne, eomma" 

A few minutes later, Jennie arrived at their dinning table wearing her favorite denim jacket with a white crop top shirt underneath, a denim shorts, a pair of pink bunny slippers and her wet hair draped in a white towel. She sat next to Rosé who slightly gasped when she smelled Jennie's sweet vanilla scent which became her favorite scent ever since she met the older girl. Rosé stared at her friend beside her, watching the latter girl's every move. Jennie was reaching for the pancake when she noticed that her tall friend is looking at her. She turned to Rosé's side to ask her if there's any problem when their eyes meet and locked with each other again for the second time. They both froze for a moment until Jennie's mother suddenly spoke.

"So Jennie, your father and I are going to leave the country and we'll be gone for a week." Eomma Kim said as she was pouring some orange juice in her husband's glass.

"Why eomma? And where are you going?" Jennie asked her mother after swallowing the pancake she was eating.

"My secretary called and told me that someone from a large company in Japan wants to invest in our company and he wants me to meet him in Osaka as soon as possible. You're mother's coming because I requested her to." Jennie's father looked at his wife smiling and held her hand "I don't want to be a lonely man in a foreign country, my princess." he then kissed his wife which made Jennie playfully threw up.

"Ugh, no PDA please. You're in front of the food. It's so disgusting." Jennie cringed making her parents and Rosé to laugh.

"Oh dear, you're just saying that because you haven't found the person who you will love for the rest of your life but when you do, you'll never think twice kissing that someone in front of many people." Jennie's mother said dreamily. Rosé looked at Jennie with longing in her eyes.

"Whatever eomma. So when are you leaving?" 

"We're leaving in about an hour and a half. Actually we have already packed our things last night so we're ready to go. We'll just finish our breakfast and then do some last preparation and then we're good to go." Jennie just nodded at her mother's statement and continued eating. As for Rosé? Well she's quite really nervous though. She never really wished to be left alone with Jennie after what happened at the older girl's room earlier before the latter girl's mother barged in.

 

"Oh crap! Oh crap! Oh crap! What should I do? What should I do?" Rosé nervously said to herself like she's in big trouble.

 

***

Fifteen minutes left before her parents' departure and Jennie's mother already gave her daughter a list on what to do and what not to do.

"Jennie, don't forget to bring the house keys when leaving the house okay. Make sure to lock the doors and windows before going to bed. And please water my pretty flowers in the garden, I don't want to see my lovely flowers dead when we get home." Jennie's mother demanded while walking hastily back and forth from the kitchen to the living room making sure that they have everything they need.

"Yes, mom. You don't have to worry about it." Jennie answered in her Kiwi accent sitting on the couch watching a Disney movie with Rosé sitting beside her, both eating strawberries.

"Chaeng, please enjoy your stay here okay. Do not let my daughter enslave you." Rosé choked on her starwberry while Jennie's mother laughed teasing her own daughter.

"Stop it eomma!" Jennie whined.

The short girl's mother laughed "If my daughter's making your stay here uncomfortable, I'm one call away. Okay Chaeng?"

"Actually, your daughter's already making me uncomfortable." Rosé wanted to say but decided not to. Instead, she just nodded and said "Ne, eomma" and smiled.

Jennie on the other hand was scowling at her mother's unstoppable teasing.

"Very good, Chaeng." Jennie's mother smiled and then look at her daughter in a very serious manner "And Jennie, no partying. Understood?" Jennie only nodded in agreement. Nobody really likes to disagree with Missis Kim when she gets serious. Who knows what the woman can do.

"Honey, we have to leave now." Mister Kim went inside the house after putting all their bags in the trunk of their rented cab. "Princess, Chaeyoung, please take care of yourselves here okay? If anything happens, then call someone for help okay." Jennie's father added before going back to the cab.

"Jennie, remember everything I said okay? And oh before I forget, please make sure to have fun and enjoy your vacation even when we're not around, okay?" Missis Kim reminded the girls for the last time.

"Ne, eomma. I'll make sure that Chaeyoung's stay here will be unforgettable." Rosé gulped hearing what her friend said but still managed to smile in front of the latter girl's mother.

"Okay then, we'll leave now. See you when we get back!" Missis Kim then walked towards their rented cab where her husband was patiently waiting for her.

"Have a safe flight eomma, appa! See you soon! Take care!" Jennie shouted and both the girls waved goodbye as soon as the cab left.

Jennie looked at the tall girl beside her making Rosé swallowed the lump in her throat.

"So Chaeng, where do you want to go today?" Jennie asked the taller girl.

"Uhm, a-anywhere Eonnie." Rosé stuttered 'Oh crap! Why did I stutter?' Rosé cursed herself.

 

***

It has been four days since Jennie's parents left the girls on their own and to say that Chaeyoung wished to disappear like a bubble is an understatement. The girls did a lot of things; went out on a movie together, attended a music festival, went to a bowling alley, went ice skating and watched an acoustic concert. They did everything for the past three days without even getting noticed by their fans or by the paparazzi. The last three days felt like a roller coaster ride for Chaeyoung. Why? Well maybe Jennie was just simply a little bit extra - a little extra sweet towards her already awkward friend. As for Chaeyoung her worst fears were slowly becoming a reality.

Today's their fourth day being alone together but they haven't got out of the house yet (because usually, for the past three days, they were already out roaming around Seoul as early as five o'clock in the morning trying to catch for the sunrise). The girls woke up feeling like zombies at ten o'clock in the morning due to the fact that they still watched the full second season of The 100 when they got home after watching the acoustic concert and then went to sleep at almost two o'clock in the morning. They missed breakfast so they decided to have their brunch at eleven o'clock and then went back to sleep. Jennie went to sleep in her room while Chaeyoung decided to just sleep on the couch since she wanted stay away from her friend for the meantime. 

"Maybe coming here with her is a bad idea" Rosé thought. "I've already buried this stupid feeling a very long time but why is it coming back? Chaeng, you should put yourself together. You've done this before, you can do it now." she added.

***

 

Chaeyoung and the rest of the Pink punk girls were inside their training room preparing for their monthly evaluation when Jennie, one of the Pink Punk girls, entered happily despite being ten minutes late.

"Where have you been, Jendeuk? Call time was ten minutes ago." Jisoo asked in a concerned tone "and why do you look so happy? Did something happened?" she added.

"I went to the salon to get my purse which I thought I lost when I saw someone." Jennie said dreamily. The girls; Jisoo, Lisa and Chaeyoung, looked at her with confusion.

"Who did you saw eonnie?" Lisa asked as she was tying the loose shoelaces on her sneakers.

"Well, she's a trainee too but from another agency. I noticed that she goes to the same salon as I do and I really find her very pretty." the cat-like eyed girl explained remembering the event that happened at the salon with a light pink blush on her cheek.

The three girls were shocked hearing what their friend said because it's very unusual for Jennie to see someone very attractive. "Did I heard you right Jen? You found someone very pretty?" Jisoo asked in surprise which earned a nod and a smile from Jennie "Well, that's new." Jisoo added.

While Jisoo and Lisa were interrogating their friend, one girl was being so unusually quiet just sitting beside them. Chaeyoung wasn't really paying attention. She was just staring intently at the enthusiastic girl telling their other two friends about her possible budding love life. Lisa noticed her unusually quiet friend who was sitting across her and nudged Jisoo who was sitting beside her and gestured to look at Chaeyoung.

"Look eonni, I think something's wrong with Chipmunk." Lisa whispered not letting Jennie or Rosé hear their conversation.

Jisoo looked at the mentioned girl "Hey Chaeyoung-ah, are you okay? You're awfully quiet today." Jennie stopped talking and looked at the girl too.

"Uhm w-what was t-that eonnie?" Rosé woke up from her trance and confusingly looked at the other three girls.

"You were fine a while ago Chipmunk but then you became unusually quiet when..." Lisa paused and turned her head to look at Jennie "when Jennie eonnie arrived. Is there something wrong between you two?" 

Rosé adjusted in her seat and act as if nothing happened "Uhm Jennie unnie and I are fine" she looked at Jennie smiling and continued talking "I suddenly just thought of something." Rosé stood up and dusted off her shorts "I think I forgot to get my evaluation sheet from manager eonnie, so I'll go outside to look for her. I'll be back before Sajangnim comes in." And with that, Rosé left not even letting the girls the chance to speak.

"Wow! She's weird." Lisa spoke right after their friend disappeared from the door.

"You know what's even more weird?" Jisoo asked which caused the two younger girls to look at her "I have her evaluation sheet. She asked me to hold it for her earlier." she added looking at the door where Chaeyoung was last seen while the two girls were dumbstruck.

 

"I already told you Chaeng, your feelings for Jennie are so useless. She can never like you back. Look at you! You look like someone who lives on the streets. She doesn't find you attractive, you're not even cute enough. So please just stop your delusions that she likes you." Chaeyoung told herself looking at the huge mirror. Her lips shivered as tears pooled in her eyes.

Rosé's not really looking for their manager to get her evaluation sheets, instead she went to the nearest bathroom. She just said that to get away from the awkward situation. She can't let her friends, especially Jennie, find out about her little secret - her feelings for the Kiwi-accented girl.

"Just forget it while you can Chaeng, while it's still not that deep." She added confidently "You can do it! I know you can. Just focus on your training and you can manage to forget her in no time"

***

"Walk faster hubby! I don't want to miss the sunset!" Jennie enthusiastically said reaching the top of the hill.

It was almost five o'clock in the afternoon and the girls were walking up the hill to watch the sunset. Two hours ago, Jennie woke up from her deep slumber. She reached for her phone on the bedside table to look for new messages but found nothing. Not really wanting to get up yet, she logged in to twitter using a fan account of herself which she created before they debuted and just scrolled. She came across a post from an inspirational account she followed about sunsets when an idea came to her mind. She got off the bed immediately and went to the living room to find Chaeyoung peacefully sleeping on the couch.

"Chaeng! Chaeng! Wake up!" she softly called the girl like how Rose called Jack from the movie Titanic shaking her. "Chaeng, wake up. We're going somewhere."

Chaeyoung was awakened by the older girl's continuous calling and shaking. "What is it eonni?" she asked the girl half asleep.

"Wake up! We're going to watch the sunset!" the older girl said with excitement.

"What? W-why?" again, the tall girl asked sitting up groggily.

"Since we missed the sunrise, I've decided to watch the sunset. Come on hubby, you have to get up now!" Jennie pulled the tall girl forcing her to get up.

"Okay eonnie. I can't believe you're this strong." Rosé chuckled getting up "Just give me ten minutes, 'kay?" she said as she walked upstairs towards the older girl's room.

***

"How did you find this place, eonnie?" the younger girl asked as she sat beside Jennie.

"It was when we had our first vacation during our trainee days. I was practicing my rap part which Sajangnim told me to do and I got so frustrated that I can't even perfectly do just even one line so I decided to take a walk to relieve stress. I was walking down by the river when I saw a pathway going up. I got so curious so I tried going to that path. And that leads me here." Jennie smiled and continued "I always go here every time I get stressed or just wanting to be alone"

Chaeyoung turned to face the older girl "I assume that you don't want to be alone cause you took me here with you so I'm guessing that you're stressed now." 

Jennie chuckled "I'm not stressed Chaeng, I just want to see the sunset. I have always believed that sunsets are proof that no matter what happens, every day can end beautifully." Jennie smile "and also, I want to watch the sunset with you."

Rosé looked at Jennie and was about to ask her why when Jennie was already looking at her. Their eyes met and neither one of them wants to break the eye contact. They both stare at each others face intently trying to figure out what to do next and remained like that for about half a minute. Suddenly, Chaeyoung felt something moved inside her chest which caused her to look away and just continued watching the sun setting. Jennie did the same and remained quiet for no one knows how long.

"Park Chaeyoung, what are you doing? You shouldn't let your guard down. This is just Jennie being randomly sweet. She doesn't really mean it in a romantic way so stop hoping. You managed to forget your feelings for her so just continue doing it." Rosé said to herself. "But how? She's doing again all the things that made you fall in love with her. And unfortunately you are having a hard time controlling it. Just let yourself feel it again, Chaeng. After all, you'll never know what it means to love someone unless you get hurt."

Rosé was so confused at the moment that she did not noticed Jennie asked her something.

"Hubby, do you really find the sunset pretty that you can no longer hear me now?" Jennie chuckled looking at the girl beside her.

"Uhm, what were you asking me eonnie?" Chaeyoung asked in confusion.

"As I've said, since we met a lot of new faces in the industry now, is there anyone who you find attractive, like having a crush on them?"

Chaeyoung was taken aback by Jennie's sudden question. In all honesty, she doesn't know how to answer that question. She's contemplating whether to tell her friend the truth or just make up a lie. Actually, telling a lie is easy but knowing that the one you love thinks that you're liking someone is just so unbearable.

"No matter how hard I try to forget my feelings for you Jen, it's just really coming back. I mean, I did everything to stay away from you but I just keep on coming back to you. No matter how hard I try to deny it but my heart keeps calling your name." Rosé thought wanting to tell the girl beside her the truth.

"So hubby, is there anyone you like right now?" Jennie asked curiously.

Rosé smiled lightly and said "No one"

 

"It's better this way, Jen. I don't want to ruin what we have. I love you but I'm sorry I have to lie."


	4. Three

Chapter 3  
“I don't wanna talk about It I don't wanna think about it I'm just feeling low, feeling low  
Even when you're next to me It's not the way I’m picturing I'm just feeling low, feeling low”  
Chaeyoung woke up to the feeling of soft hands playing with her hair. Fingertips gently brushed against her scalp softly scratching here and softly stroking there. As she gently opened her eyes she realized that she was sleeping on Jennie Kim’s shoulder while they sat comfortably on the couch doing their daily routine of old Disney movie marathons. Jennie was so engrossed in ‘the sleeping beauty’ that she didn’t even realize Rose’ was awake. Or maybe it was because almost as soon as she woke up Chaeyoung zoned out to the traffic in her mind  
2016  
‘It’s a big day’ Chaeyoung or Rose’ rather said to herself as she looked in the mirror one last time before their debuet showcase ‘this is it. Years or training and I have finally made it’ she smiled tearing up thinking back to how all the hardships had finally paid off. Once I’m out on the stage my life will never be the same again’ she turned around and looked at her members all rubbing their palms in nervousness and getting ready  
‘Lisa-yah I could never have asked for a better best friend. I’m so glad we are in this together. Hope we can create just as beautiful memories together in the future as we have in the past’ she thought to herself as she looked at Lisa  
‘Jisoo unnie. You are the best. You always know how to cheer me up. You are always there to make me feel loved when I am lonely. You are always there to make me see my worth when I feel worthless. You gave me strength when I was on the verge of quitting. You are a visual goddess on the outside but even more beautiful on the inside. I don’t how I could have done this without you. Thank you for being the source of all our strenths’ she thought looking at Jisoo who noticed her and smiled a comforting smile as she always did before their evaluations. Then finally her eyes darted to Jennie who was looking breathtakingly beautiful that day. Chaeyoung found it hard to take here eyes off the older girl  
‘Jennie Unnie. I don’t know what else to say except that I am sorry. I am sorry I stayed locked in my room when you asked me to spend time with you. I am sorry I kept pushing you away. I’m sorry that we are distant today. It is my fault. I couldn’t control my feelings. But today as we begin a new life I hope we can have a new beginning too. It won’t be the same but I hope you know it is for our best. I don’t know if I can ever stop feeling for you the way I feel but I have to hide it deep within me. Forever. For us’  
“Hey there sleeping beauty” Jennie’s voice bought Chaeyoung back to the present  
“Uh Unnie. I’m sorry I didn’t realize I fell asleep”  
“You must be really tired from our trip up the hill earlier” Jennie chuckeled “You were in such a deep sleep I thought I would have to give you the kiss of life to wake you up like the Prince had to Aurora” she saod refrencing the movie that had just ended. This turned Chaeyoung into a nervous blushing mess “What? I’m just joking don’t look so scared” Jennie wrapped her arm around Chaeyoung’s shoulder as she scrolled through her phone and came across photos of Jisoo and Lisa at the rooftop bar in Thailand that they had just visited.  
Meanwhile sleepy Rose’ , despite the awkward moment a minute ago hesitantly cuddled closer to her Eonnie. Jennie’s warmth really comforted her, but there was something about her scent. It was sweet and comforting. It made Chaeyoung feel at home.  
“Chaeyoungie” Jennie said studying the photos of their members “I was wondering if tomorrow you would like to go to the new rooftop hotel in town, for brunch. I remember Seungri oppa saying it’s good. I’ve been meaning to go there ever since”  
Chaeyoung looked up to meet Jennie’s chocolate brown eyes “sure” she smiled softly trying hard not to stare. Suddenly Jennie yawned and pulled Chaeyoung in for a hug “I’m so glad we are spending these holidays together”  
“So am I” Rose’ said carefully placing an arm on Jennie’s waist as the older girl wrapped both arms around the younger girl’s shoulders tightly  
“Are you really?”  
“What makes you think I’m not?”  
I don’t know. You don’t seem so open to fun anymore. Remember how bubbly and enthusiastic you used to be whenever you came over before the debuet. We used to run around everywhere together. Now you are too quiet and secluded”  
“Ohh I am sorry” Chaeyoung said sheepishly  
“Don’t be. I understand you are stressed and tired but so am I. I just want you to relax and enjoy yourself for once. Will you do that tomorrow hubby for me?”  
Rose’ smiled “Of course wifey. I’ll do anything for you”  
“Oh really?” Jennie smirked “Carry me upstairs then”   
Chaeyoung looked surprised but she obeyed standing up so Jennie could hop onto her back “Sorry if I am too heavy”  
“Yep you need to cut down on carbs” Chaeyoung joked earning a slap on the arm   
“You need to exercise more!” Jennie teased as Chaeyoung struggeled to carry her up the stairs. But Jennie laughing made her smile too. Maybe Jennie was right a little loosening up could do her good. She deserved to have a little fun after all.  
“Come on Chaeyoungie. Nearly done! If you can make it up to the final step I’ll buy you desert tomorrow” That was all the motivation Chaeyoung needed to rush up the stairs with Jennie without pausing, but after she finally let Jennie down she collapsed on the floor “This is probably Karma for doing this to Lisa” Chaeyoung joked making Jennie smile her gummy innocent smile.   
“Come on” the older girl tugged Chaeyoung’s arms  
“I will have my revenge!” Chaeyoung announced finally standing up and walking with Jennie to the room  
“Oh yeah? How so?”  
Chaeyoung had an evil grin “Ghost stories!”  
“Don’t you dare Park Chaeyoung!” Jennie said throwing a pillow right in her face and laughing. Rose’ Picked it up and threw it back but Jennie ducked “Ha!” she teased then dashed to the other side of the room as Chaeyoung playfully chased her “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” Jennie laughed as Chaeyoung cornered her and tried to tickle her “Stop stop I’ll buy starters too”  
“That’s more like it” Chaeyoung grinned as Jennie playfully pushed her away.  
That night as Jennie cuddled the younger girl, instead of being hesitant as usual Chaeyoung smiled. This was the most fun she had had with Jennie. Maybe she was over doing the whole pushing Jennie away thing. Maybe all she had to do was be herself and have fun with Jennie like the did in the trainee days. Yes her feelings were still there but she felt happier in that moment. Little did she know as she fell asleep that it would all fall apart the next day  
**********************************************  
The next day  
“Oh my!” Chaeyoung exclaimed in disappointment.  
“What is it Rosie?” Jennie asked fixing her white shirt  
“The skies have opened up”, Chaeyoung said as she let her long and fair hands out of the window of Jennie’s bedroom to meet the tiny raindrops at her fingertips.  
Though the weather was predicted to be clear without any hint of rain, the slight drizzle quickly turned into a noticeable shower.  
“Looks like we have to cancel our reservation then” Jennie blurted out in displeasure. “No point in going to a rooftop diner when it rains like this” she sighed  
“Guess we have to stay back now then?” asked Chaeyoung though she knew that the answer would be affirmative.  
“Shall I order from the new place at Daegu? I have heard its pretty good too.” Jennie smiled at the visibly disappointed younger girl. “Or we could cook together! That’s always fun”  
“I don’t know…” Chaeyoung gazed out of the window sadly “I was really looking forward to our brunch at the Grand.” Especially after her new found approach and reignited friendship with Jennie after the previous night.  
Jennie had understood that Rosie was distressed about the sudden cancellation of their plans. Keen to bring Chaeyoung’s spirit up Jennie was desperate to appeal to her softer side.  
“Let’s go down and sit by the balconey Chaeng! Lets welcome the rains even if it’s from a distance.”  
Rosie could guess Jennie’s unnatural tone and quickly deciphered that her eonnie was trying to cheer her up. As much as she hated the slightest thought of possibly getting drenched in the soundly paced downpour, she appreciated her Jendukie’s thought and decided to follow her down the stairs.  
“It does seem a little cold though” Chaeyoung stated as she put on a fancy sweater gown.  
“Oh come on Rosie! Its been quiet a while since it has rained. Let’s have some fun it’s already short vacation as it is.”  
Jennie then quickly jogged out towards the garden, swung her arms out and let out a decent cry of joy.  
“Seriously?”  
“Why not?”  
“Fine!”  
Chaeyoung joined in but felt an instant sense of regret as she realized that she was letting her expensive sweater get drenched. However, just as she was about to rush back inside Jennie caught her arm  
“Hubby, hold up!”  
“Eonnie my sweater is getting wet.”  
“Oh come on Chipmunk don’t be such a spoil sport!”  
“No!” she exclaimed repeatedly as she tried to get back inside.   
A face to face hand tugging event had just been initiated.  
Jennie as her ever playful ways was enjoying the rain and only wished that her younger bandmate would join in rather than struggle away from her clutches.   
Just as Rosie was about to give in Jennie pulled at a larger thrust than before.  
Startled, Chaeyoung loosing the sense of her balance fell forwards. Jennie was taken by surprise as well and started to loose her balance as well. Rosie tried to catch her Eonnie, however her heels gave in and in a vain effort to prevent falling, she leaned forward towards Jennie.  
……………..  
In a couple of seconds both were on the ground Rosie on top of Jendukie.  
“Ah hubby you are not as light as you seem” Jennie giggled wrapping her arms around Rosie’s neck who was still in shock, her hands, now slightly muddy, clutching the grass and her face on Jennie’s shoulder.   
It was a position she didn’t know how badly she had wanted to be in for the past few days. Or rather, years.  
Jennie patted her back, still giggling, asking Chaeyoung if she was fine.  
Meanwhile Rosie had drifted away from reality into another zone. She forgot about her expensive sweater that was now muddy, her freshly manicured nails which were now chipped and her recently treated hair that was now a mess.  
Her attention drifted instead to Jennie’s scent as she couldn’t resist the urge to shift her face to fit into the crevice of Jennie’s neck and slowly breath in her soft flowery fragrance while brushing her nose softly against Jennie’s neck. She had avoided doing this the last night when Jennie had held her so tight, but she couldn’t resist the urge anymore.  
“Chaeyoung…” Jennie said softly in a confused tone. She was taken aback by what was happening, but feeling Rosie’s face against her neck gave rise to a tingling in her belly. “What is happening?” Jennie thought to herself as her grip around Rose tightened.   
The next thing that happened took them both by surprise. Rose brushed her lips across Jennie’s neck to her cheek. Her heart raced and the butterflies in her stomach could no longer be contained as she placed a soft peck on Jennie’s lips.   
What was even more surprising though was when Jennie leaned in as well kissing her back. Her hands slowly sliding down Chaeyoung’s back as she took her lower lip between hers.  
The kisses were soft and addictive. Long and wet. Warm and passionate.  
Despite the cold rain softly falling on them, their faces burned hot. Neither of them knew what was happening, yet neither of them wanted it to end. Their hands found each other and their fingers interlocked as they continued to kiss until Rose finally pulled away.  
Their eyes met. The dreamy look in Jennie’s eyes turned to confusion as she saw panic in Rosie’s.  
“Eonnie…I…” Rose’ got off Jennie and stood up so quickly that she nearly lost her balance once again. She looked down at Jennie who was sitting up, slowly pulling away from Chaeyoung  
“I…” Tears choked Chaeyoung who had been taken aback by her own actions. Years of containing her fellings had finally poured all out.  
Her swollen lips, now smudged with Jennie’s maroon lipstick, quivered. She looked away as tears pooled in her eyes and dashed indoors.  
Jennie sat in the rain, just as shocked. Her face still burnt hot as she lifted her fingers to her lips that were already craving Rose’s softness again.  
“What the hell” she thought to herself. “What the..What just happened…”  
She wasn’t too sure if she was more surprised at the fact that Rosie had kissed her or the fact that she had kissed her back and wanted to kiss her again. She slowly stood feeling dazed and walked indoors to clean up.  
…………………………..  
Rose didn’t make eye contact with Jennie all evening. Even as they ate Chinese together on Jennie’s dinning table that jennie had ordered for lunch Chaeyoung simply couldn’t look at Jennie. Just feeling Jennie’s gaze at her made Chaeyoung tear up. Jennie noticed this but didn’t know what to say.  
After she had eaten Rosie went straight to their room grabbed a jacket and dashed down the stairs again  
“Where are you going” Jennie asked as Chaeyoung reached for the door knob  
‘Ill be back soon” Chaeyoung walked out without even looking at Jennie. After shutting the door behind her she ran. She dashed across the streets crying. It wasn’t safe to be out by herself but she needed to be alone. ‘I have ruined it! It’s been destroyed! She will never look at me the same way again. Damn you Park Chaeyoung. Damn you!”  
At home Jennie sat on the couch by herself trying to watching the television but she couldn’t. Her mind couldn’t focus on anything but what had happened a few hours ago  
“Does she have feelings for me? Or was it just a platonic thing that happened by accident? It didn’t feel like an accident thought” she continued thinking “but why did I kiss her back? I don’t like her like that…or do I..?” Jennie didn’t want to think anymore. She picked up her phone. She wanted to call Chaeyoung and ask her if she was fine. Where was she? When will she be back? She wanted to talk about what happened. But she knew Chaeyoung needed some space.  
Just then the doorknobturned  
“Princess are you home?”  
“Eomma! Appa!” Jennie dashed out to hug her parents   
“How are you angel?” her father asked “Where is Chaeyoung”  
‘I…uh” Jennie cleared her throat “She went out. Said she had some work”  
“Oh what work?” Her mother asked sitting on the couch  
Jennie shook her head “She didn’t say anything  
“You probably scared her away” Her father joked  
‘I guess you are right’ Jennie thought to herself as she went to get some refreshments for her parents “So how was Japan?”


	5. Four

CHAPTER 4  
“Go ahead and watch my heart burn, with the fire that you started in me…”  
Rosé shivered slightly as she sat in the coffee shop, drenched from her head to toe. Her usually bright and sparkly eyes were now dull and swollen from crying. Her usually good appetite was now completely gone as all she ordered was one cup of espresso which she clutched softly in her hands  
“It’s over” tears once again started pooling in her eyes as she pulled out her phone. She scrolled through her contacts and stopped when she spotted her best friend’s name, Lisa.  
“What can I tell her? She doesn’t even know that I…that I like girls.” Chaeyoung thought to herself as her heart raced. Chaeyoung wanted to talk to someone but she wasn’t open although she was ready to open up to those close to her. But she was too afraid; she didn’t want to loose any more people.   
Just then a memory from her trainee days came back to her. 

“Chaeyoung-ah can I talk to you” Chaeyoung looked up from her guitar to see Jisoo standing at the door.  
“Of course Unnie” she smiled as Jisoo walked into the room and kneeled in front of Chaeyoung grabbing her hand  
“Look Chaeyoung, if something is wrong, if something is bothering you, you can tell me”  
“Uh...what makes you think that I am bothered by something?”  
Jisoo smiled at her sadly “It’s pretty obvious. You are very distracted, you haven’t been eating properly, and I can see your eyes swollen from crying time to time”  
Chaeyoung looked away “Oh”  
“Everyone is worried about you especially Lisa. You guys are best friends yet you barely spend time with her anymore, or with me and Jennie. You just sit locked in your room. So please if there is something that’s bothering you, share it.”  
“Unnie I… I don’t know” Chaeyoung knew though, and she wanted to tell Jisoo. She wanted to say “Unnie I think I might like girls, I know this because I really like Jennie unnie but she likes someone else and I don’t know what to do. It’s so difficult keeping all this to myself but I can’t tell anyone...not yet” she thought to herself but didn’t have the courage to say. Jisoo noticed the hesitance in her eyes  
“Very well then” Jisoo said squeezing her hands “It’s ok if you are not willing to tell me, but vent it out, write a note or something. Trust me it will help” Chaeyoung nodded and Jisoo stood up to leave “And we are always here for you Chaeyoung-ah”

“Excuse me” Chaeyoung sheepishly approached the counter “could I…could I get some tissues and a pen please?” the lady at the counter gave Chaeyoung a look of pity as she handed her what she asked for. Chaeyoung bowed and went back to her seat as she began writing on the tissues  
‘6-07-2018 I am sitting in a coffee shop alone, just me and my stupid broken heart. Sometimes I really wonder why I let this happen in the first place. It wasn’t like there was any chance of her returning my feelings, but I still let her in. I regret not having walked away the moment I started catching feelings for her. It didn’t take long for that to happen after I came over to Korea but I’m not sure the exact moment when it happened. Maybe it was when she would sit by my side at 4 am during my first week and hold me while I cried my heart out missing my home and my family. Maybe it was when she took me to Hongdae for the first time. We weren’t alone but it felt like we were as we held hands and ran around the streets until we got tired. Maybe it was when I was yelled at during evaluations and she came after me when I ran to cry in the bathroom, so she could wipe my tears and give me courage. Maybe it was because of the times she came to me and asked me to play her the guitar. Maybe it was the time when she arranged a surprise party for me on my birthday, it was the first time we danced together or maybe it was when she stood up for me when those girls ganged up on me and bullied me.   
Anyways, it doesn’t matter because I know she never liked me like that. There were some other trainees occasionally she would like. There was this guy she used to have a crush on and even a girl once, I should have been happy for her but every time I watched her blush while holding hands with the girl it made my heart ache. Why couldn’t I be that girl, I loved her more than that trainee did, I was willing to do so much for her. I would take her shopping and hold her bags while she tried on dresses, I would have written her songs and serenaded her, I would have bought her small gifts daily just to see her smile, I would have taken her to places, we would have spent the weekends together cuddling and watching movies while eating pizza, we would have sneaked out of our dorm to go on adventures together, I would have done anything to ensure that the smile never left her lips, I swear I could have jumped in front of a car for her, in return all I wanted was for her to love me, why was it so much to ask. Didn’t I deserve that? I was the one who was there for her during those nights when she would cry by herself until she falls asleep, I was the one she would open up to. I was the one around whom she didn’t need to be the sexy badass Jennie Kim but instead the cute and clingy Jenduek she is. Why was it so hard for her to see how I would do anything for her happiness?  
I tried burying my feelings even though I deserved to have my feelings returned but I know she never will. I’m just a nice girl, I’m not that pretty or funny or sexy or charming person she usually likes. I am just someone for her to go to when she wants to cry because she can’t cry in front of other people.   
After our debut, I managed to create a distance between us. I would be lying if I said that it didn’t make my heart ache every time I saw her even though the distance did seem to eventually help. But alas, it didn’t take even a week of us by ourselves to ensure my feelings came rushing back to me. And now here I am. I don’t deserve the hurt or maybe I do, I didn’t want to fall for her. I just did and now I’m hurting all alone. Why does it have to be this way, why does it have to be so hard? I wonder if…’  
Just then her phone buzzed startling her  
‘Come home, it’s getting late. My parents are back’ read the text that she had just received from Jennie. She glanced out of the coffee shop to notice that the sun was in fact about to set. It wasn’t very safe for her to be out by herself this late. She pocketed the tissue and stood up to leave as she wiped away her tears. She definitely felt lighter in her heart as she walked back to Jennie’s house.

 

***

It was already dark when Rosé arrived at the Kim’s Residence. As she entered the front door, small chatters can be heard from the dining room. Rosé quickly walked past where the family’s currently eating their dinner when unfortunately, the mother of the Kim’s noticed her.

“Oh Chaeyoung-ah, you’re already here.”  
Rosé stopped in her tracks and faced to where the voice came from.  
“Ah, yes eomma. I just arrived.” She smiled looking at the family except for the girl who was having her head down with her eyes focused only on her food.  
“Come and have dinner with us Chaeng.” Mister Kim offered “we sure do miss having a meal with you.” He added.  
“Ah, thank you appa but I already had dinner before I went back here.” Rosé politely declined lying about having dinner already. “I’ll just go upstairs and prepare myself to sleep. Welcome home by the way.” She added.  
Rosé smiled and went to walk upstairs towards Jennie’s room. As she entered, she immediately went to the closet to grab her bag and packed her things. For Rosé, coming in to this place with Jennie is already a wrong idea and staying for another day is a great torture. Walking back and forth, she quickly took all her things, folded all her clothes and placed it inside her bag, not minding if her things were organized or not, before Jennie arrives and stop her from leaving.  
A few minutes later, as she was zipping her bag close, Jennie comes in. Confusion was evident on the older girl’s face as she saw the tall girl’s packed things lying on her bed. Just as she was about to look for Rosé, the tall girl walked out from the bathroom all dressed in her pyjamas wiping her just-washed face with a towel.  
“Where are you going?” Jennie asked with seriousness in her voice.  
The tall girl finally met Jennie’s eyes for the first time since their moment, just shrugged and plainly said “I’m leaving.”  
Jennie got alarmed after hearing what her friend said “What? But why?”  
Rosé took her things from Jennie’s bed and placed it on the chair beside the closet. She looked at the older girl uninterestingly and answered the question. “I’m no longer comfortable here, unnie.”   
“You’re not comfortable? Why? What made uncomfortable, Chaeng? Please tell me. I promised Lisa and Jisoo-unnie to make you happy while we’re on this vacation and knowing that you’re uncomfortable makes me a failure.”   
Rosé took the mattress from Jennie’s closet and the extra pillow on the bed without answering the older girl’s question. She then placed the mattress on the floor while Jennie’s being confused as to what the younger girl is currently doing. “You can have the bed, unnie. I’m sleeping here on the floor.”  
“No, Rosie. You can sleep here on the bed.” The older girl sighed and took the blanket from the younger girl as she was about to cover herself.  
"Unnie please, I’m tired. I want to sleep already. Just give me that blanket.” Rosé said calmly not wanting her emotions to take over her.  
“Is this about what happened earlier today? Is this about the kiss? Look Chaeng, if this is about it then let’s forget that it happened.” Jennie said trying to reassure the tall girl that what happened was nothing to her.  
“Forget? Do you think I can forget about it that easily, Jen?” Rosé blurted out in her Australian accent that shocked Jennie.  
“Chaeng, I...” Jennie tried to say something but the younger girl cut her off.  
“Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to forget about that kiss? I spent the whole day doing everything to forget about it but it’s not leaving my stupid head, Jen.” Rosé stood up and stared at Jennie with pain in her eyes as she started crying. “Maybe it was nothing to you but it means something to me and it is breaking me.” Rosé harshly wiped the tears on her face. “It breaks me unnie and I don’t even know how to fix myself or if I can still fix myself.”  
Being shocked is an understatement for Jennie as she was thinking on how to approach her crying friend. She then slowly walked close to the crying girl and tried hugging her, luckily for her, Rosé did not push her away. The older girl led Rosé to sit on the bed and just let her cry on her shoulder.  
“I’m sorry Hubby. I’m sorry if that kiss...that kiss made you uncomfortable. I mean, I know how much you treasure your first kiss and here I am just took it away from you. I shouldn’t have let that happened. It could've been avoided. I mean I shouldn't have kissed back right? I’m so sorry, Chaeng. Please don’t think about it too much. These things happen and it won’t change anything between us.” The older girl tried to console the younger girl thinking that it was the reason why Rosé wants to leave  
Hearing what the older girl said, Rosé then pulled herself away from the short girl. “You don’t understand unnie.”  
Jennie stared at the younger girl’s eyes full of tears “What do you mean, Chaeng?”  
Rosé stared back at Jennie’s eyes with the same intensity the older girl’s giving her.  
“I like you, Jen. No, let me rephrase that. I am in love with you.” Rosé confessed in her full Australian accent.  
“Uhm, Ch-chaeng what are you saying?” Jennie said unable process what the tall girl suddenly confessed.  
“You might find it hard to believe but unnie I already have feelings for you ever since we were trainees. I tried so hard to just forget about this stupid feeling and I thought that it was gone but with this whole vacation thing I...it came back. I am feeling it again and this time, I can no longer control it.” Rosé confessed as she was crying so hard looking intently at the love of her life. Her hands had gone cold and her heart was racing.  
Jennie couldn’t respond or maybe she doesn’t want to respond. Her mind stopped working. It wasn’t her first time that someone confessed their love to her and during those times, she wasn’t having a hard time rejecting someone’s feelings but this time is different. She doesn’t want to hurt her friend even more. So instead of responding to her friend’s confession, she stood up, grabbed the tall girl’s hand and guided her to lie down on the bed.  
“Come on Chaeng, let’s sleep. If you want to go home tomorrow then we’ll go home together.” Jennie then turned to the other side with her back facing Rosé’s.  
Rosé knew all along that the older girl doesn’t feel the same way. She just had to do what she thinks was the right thing to do, what she thinks would help her let go and completely forget her feelings towards the older girl. She knew right then and there that their friendship is already falling apart and it was because of her, because of her stupid feelings.  
Rosé faced the side opposite to Jennie, their backs facing each other, and just cried. She cried silently pouring her heart out until there’s no more tears left to cry. Unbeknownst to Rosé, Jennie was also crying silently. Not because she was hurt but because she doesn’t want to hurt her friend. She can’t tell Rosé that she doesn’t feel the same way in front of her friend’s face. Sure she loves the tall girl but not like how the tall girl loves her. She only sees her as a friend, a very important one.   
Thinking that the tall girl has fallen asleep, Jennie moved and turned to face the tall girl’s back. “I’m sorry Chaeng. I’m sorry that I don’t love you like how you love me and I’m sorry if I didn’t say anything awhile ago. I just don’t want to hurt you, Chaeng but I think I already did. You are a wonderful person Chaeng and I don’t deserve your love, I don’t even deserve you. I’m so sorry hubby.” Jennie kissed Rosé’s temple and then went to turn back to her original position.  
Rosé could no longer stop crying right after hearing what the older girl said. She pretended that she has fallen asleep when she felt Jennie moved hoping for a slightest bit that the older girl would hug her but instead, all she got was a hard slap of truth that the older girl doesn’t love her back.

Rosé forced herself to sleep with a heavy heart and wished that when she wakes up the next day, everything will be back to normal like how they were before.


	6. Five

"Why do I pull you close and then ask you for space? If all it is is eight letters, why is it so hard to say?"

 

TWO WEEKS.

 

It has been exactly two weeks since Jennie and Chaeyoung came back to their dorm from their fun-turned-awkward vacation at Jennie's family's house and to say that the both of them hoped for everything to go back to normal is actually the opposite of what happened. Arriving at their dorm two days prior their two members' arrival is somewhat a wrong choice but staying at the older girl's parents' house is a wrong choice as well and that leaves them with no choice but to endure the awkward atmosphere they felt.

 

But now two weeks later the girls are currently in their practice room resting, feeling sore and hungry. They have just finished their whole day rehearsal in preparation for their upcoming performances and the girls are lying lazily on the floor with their eyes on their phones. 

 

“Girls, I’ll go ahead. I have to go to somewhere.””

The girls heard one of their members blurt out. Chaeyoung came out of their practice room’s bathroom already dressed in a black skinny jeans and white crop top t-shirt, wearing an Adidas Stan Smith Limited Edition Orange White shoes and a black strap back baseball cap to match her outfit.

“But we’re about to have dinner, Chaeng.” Jisoo stated making Lisa and Jennie look at the leaving girl waiting for an answer.

Rosé grabbed her Louis Vuitton Bumbag 2018 and wore it around her torso. “I’ll just have my dinner to where I’m heading to, unnie.” She looked down “I promised my old friends I’ll meet them” Chaeyoung smiled ”

The oldest girl sighed as Lisa’s eyes squinted “Alright Chaeng but be back home before midnight, okay? And please be careful””

Rosé walked towards the door “If ever I’ll be home past midnight, can you please cover me up to manager oppa or manager unnie?””

Jisoo only nodded and said “Fine but you have to take care of yourself, Park Chaeyoung. Be safe.””

Rosé just smiled and exited the door hearing a tired “Take care and have fun Chipmunk” coming from Lisa before the door closed.

 

Lisa and Jisoo noticed the quiet cat-like-eyed girl lying near the wall-sized mirror who was just listening to the interaction happened between the oldest girl and the girl who just left. Since the oldest member and the maknae arrived home from their vacation about two weeks ago, they’ve already noticed the silence between the second and the third member. Spending the whole two weeks without witnessing the two girls interact with each other made Jisoo and Lisa got confused and curious as to what happened during the two girls’ vacation at Jennie Kim’s house. Moreover Lisa being Chaeyoung’s bestfriend had already noticed a change in Chaeyoung’s behavior and literally anyone could tell there was some sort of tension between Jennie and Chaeyoung.

Lisa, as the curious-girl-who always-wants- to-know-everything as she is, interrogated Jennie.

“Unnie, what happened between you and Rosie during your vacation?” she asked”’

Not knowing what to answer, Jennie stares off in space as she remembered the events happened two weeks ago.

 

Jennie and Chaeyoung arrived at their dorm around four o'clock in the afternoon feeling exhausted after an hour drive (although Jennie's parents' house is just within the city of Seoul, it'll always take from 45 minutes to an hour drive to their dorm usually because of the heavy traffic). Feeling a little awkward, Chaeyoung tried to go immediately inside her room when Jennie called her which made her stop.

"Chaeng, can we talk. Please." the older girl pleaded.

Chaeyoung turned to face Jennie "About what unnie?"

"You exactly know what it is about, Chaeng." 

Jennie's right, the tall girl exactly knows what it is about but pretended to know nothing. "I have no idea what you are talking about unnie."

Jennie sighed in defeat "About us, Chaeng."

Taken aback, Chaeyoung replied in her Australian accent "There's no us, Jen."

"I know. What I mean is what will happen to us now? I can't afford losing you, Chaeng. You know I love you." Jennie said with sadness in her voice.

"Yeah" Chaeyoung sighed "but not like how I feel for you" she whispered but enough for Jennie to hear her.

"I'm so sorry, hubby. I didn't mean to hurt you." 

"It's okay, unnie. I understand." Chaeyoung smiled. "Just let me be by myself for now."

Jennie was about to speak more but the tall girl already entered her bedroom closing its door. Letting out a sad sigh, the short girl walked inside her bedroom, locked it and laid down the bed trying to stop herself from crying.

 

"Earth to Jendeuk! Hello? Are you still with us?"

Jisoo waved her hand in front of Jennie's face which made the latter girl went back to her senses.

"Uhm sorry." Jennie sat up leaning her back against the wall-sized mirror "What's that again?" 

"Lisa was asking you about what happened between you and Chaeng because you know; Lisa and I can really feel the tension between you two. What happened on your vacation Jendeuk? The last thing I remembered was you telling us to make Chaeyoung happy and not the other way around.” Jisoo asked.

Jennie sighed “Nothing unnie. We just went out; went to a movie theater, watched a concert, binge watched Netflix, watched Disney movies walked to the park and that’s it. Nothing happened aside from that.”” 

The cat-eyed girl looked away trying to dodge the judging stares coming from the two girls after telling them what happened. Well not exactly everything that happened. Jennie did not disclose any details about that kiss because she thinks that it’ll surely freaked the two girls out. 

“Are you sure unnie? Because I really think that something happened during your vacation. You wouldn’t act like you don’t know each other if nothing happened.” Lisa asked trying to fish out more information from the older girl. “Chaeng looks really unhappy and lost these days and so do you!” Lisa was becoming impatient making Jisoo grab her hand to calm her down

Jennie was shocked at the younger girl getting angry “Look, whether you believe me or not, I am telling you that nothing happened. Rosie and I just spent our vacation like normal people would. If you think that Rosie and I are awkward with each other then that’s no longer my problem.” Jennie stood up and walked directly to the bathroom.

Lisa and Jisoo looked at each other.

“Unnie, do you think Jennie unnie’s telling the truth?” Lisa asked the older girl.

“I don’t know Lisa. But what I surely know is something is up between the two of them. Rosie wouldn’t act like Jennie’s invisible or something because we all know how clingy she is to Jennie. And Jennie wouldn’t just let Rosie leave like that without even knowing where she’s heading to. Do you get my point?” Jisoo squinted her eyes looking at Lisa.

“I surely got your point, unnie. So what are we going to do now?” Lisa asked.

“I don’t know for now but we’ll have to figure out what is up.” Jisoo said firmly.

Lisa nodded saying "I'm with you, unnie. I don’t look seeing Chipmunk or Jennie Unnie like this" and tried to think of a plan on how to make Jennie or Rosie talk about what really happened between them.

 

***************************************  
Rosé didn’t really indulge in alcohol. She was the legal age and had been to the bar a couple times, usually with her members to celebrate but she never drank too much. However after everything that had happened in the past week Rosé found herself standing in front of the bar. She had lied to her members about meeting friends. Her intentions were something different.

“One drink won’t do me any harm. I need it. No one has to know” her heart raced as she approached the bar and walked in. It was a bar reserved mainly for the high class, idols and celebrities thus Rosé was assured she wouldn’t draw a lot of attention. She walked in and asked for whiskey. “Just one glass. Its ok”  
******************************************  
“Scuse me. One more” *hic* “One more glass please” Rosé slurred holding up the empty glass  
The bartender looked at her with surprise “Are you sure Miss?” He knew that she was by herself and it wasn’t safe for her to have more than six glasses like this by herself

“Yes obviously” Rosé slurred back as he took the glass and went to get her a refill. Rosé looked around. The world was spinning, she could barely decipher anything. Sweat beads had pooled on her forehead and gently slithered down her face. She knew she couldn’t even walk anymore . A couple more glasses and she would pass out.

‘One more glass. That’ll be it’ she told herself but knew that she had no intention of stopping anytime soon. She practically cheered as the bartender bought her another glass “Thank you.” She hiccupped and drank

“Hey” Rosé slammed the glass down and looked up to see a man staring down at her “are you having a good time?”  
“You bet I am!” She replied in her thick accent with a wide smile “It is true what they say about alcohol. It surely eases the pain in your heart even if it gives you a pain in the head” she laughed  
“I see. Broken heart?”  
“Yes” she slurred sadly  
“Can I buy you another drink?”  
“Sure!” she said. Clearly not in her senses anymore as the guy sat down beside her closing the gap between them by putting his arm around her as she dropped herself on him. He smirked. She was a mess he didn’t even need to spike her drink.  
“Excuse me. Do you mind? She is with me” The guy turned around to look at another girl glaring at him “Can you get your hands off of her? Or do you want me to create a scene?”   
“Ok mam” He stood up and walked away with a sigh  
Rosé turned around to face her saviour “Nayeonieee unnieee” she slurred “Eonnieee *hic* it’s been so long”  
“Are you crazy Rosé?” Im Nayeon walked up to the tall girl and took the glass away from her “You could have been in so much trouble. He could have taken advantage of you”  
“Thank you” Rosé slurred standing up and pulling the shorter girl in her arms. Nayeon was surprised as Rosé started crying loudly “Rosie calm down it’s ok”  
Rosé looked up to meet her friend’s eyes “Please help me”   
“What happened?”  
“I..she…it’s her fault” Rosé hiccupped  
“Whose fault? What fault?”  
“She doesn’t like me. I ruined our friendship. Look at me Unnie. Am I ugly or dumb? What do I lack”  
“You are drunk and over thinking”  
Rosé groaned softly before placing her head against Nayeon and passing out  
“What the…” Nayeon turned around to meet Jeongyeon’s eyes “What happened here?”  
“I noticed her getting drunk out of her sense by herself so I came to help her but she passed out in my arms.” Nayeon told Jeongyeon who walked up to the duo and helped Nayeon seat Rosé “Should I call the Blackpink members Unnie?”  
“Let’s get her out of here first.” Nayeon said  
******************************************************  
Rosé woke up groaning as a throbbing head ache gripped her forehead. “What in the the…” she looked around trying to figure out where she was “whose clothes...” she wondered looking at the pajamas  
“Good morning” she nearly jumped as Nayeon walked into the room “Nayeon Unnie? What the”  
“Have this first” Nayeon handed her a pill and a glass of water. Rosé obeyed  
“Good. Let’s have breakfast.” She guided her to the dinning room of Twice’s dorm as Rosé tried to recall what had happened.   
“Unnie…what happened?” she asked sheepinshly  
“I’ll tell you Rosé -ah. Have a seat first and don’t worry the other members don’t know. Me and Jeongyeon found you and brought you back with us. We told them we found you outside taking a walk and invited you to come over and spend some time but you were so tired that you fell asleep in the car so we put you straight to bed.”  
“Oh…”  
“We said the same thing to your members too. They were worried about you. I told them I’ll drive you back to the dorm after breakfast”  
“Thank you Nayeon Unnie and I’m sorry”  
“Do you remember everything then?”  
“Bits” Rosé teared up realising the trouble and worry she had caused her friends  
“Good because you better not do this again! Imagine what could have happened had I not been there! It’s not safe to get so drunk by yourself that too so late in the evening. You not only got your members worried but imagine if the media had seen you! You could have been kicked out of your company!” Nayeon scolded the younger girl  
Rosé heard Nayeon out and nodded with tears streaming down her cheeks “I will never do that again I promise”  
“Good. Im not telling anyone this time but if you repeat such stupid stunts your members are just a phone call away”  
“I am sorry” Rosé couldn’t meet Nayeon’s eyes who slowly scooted over and gave Rosé a hug. “Im sorry I yelled at you. I was just worried”  
“I’m sorry I worried you”  
“Ok that’s enough apologising” Nayeon smiled  
“Where are the twice members?” Rosé asked  
“They went out shopping. I stayed back to look after you”  
Rosé felt even more guilty “ Oh..sorry”  
They went back to eating silently, but after a while Nayeon broke the silence “So will you tell me what happened?”  
Rosé looked away “Uhm”  
“You were saying something about some girl not loving you back…is that the reason for you to get drunk alone like that”  
Rosé sheepishly nodded “I’m sorry” she said for the nth time as Nayeon sighed then smiled at her softly  
“It’s ok. I have been in your place. I get it.”  
Rosé looked up “Really?”  
“Yeah. I may be with Jeongyeon now but it wasn’t always this way. She didn’t always love me back”  
“Oh well Jennie also…” she stopped realising she had named Jennie making Nayeon smirk   
“Someone has high standards. Jennie Kim huh!”  
Rosé blushed hard “I…I mean..”  
Don’t worry Chaeyoung ah” Nayeon patted her back “This all stays between you and me. I saw how sad you were yesterday. I genuinely want to help you.”  
Rosé smiled widely and hugged Nayeon  
“But you must keep your promise never to hurt by yourself again. And especially not get drunk by yourself!”  
Rosé apologised again making Nayeon smile  
“You are the first person I talked to about this. Apart from Jennie unnie”  
“What did Jennie say”  
“That she doesn’t love me back”  
“I see” Nayeon watched as tears pooled in Rosé’s eyes again “I wanted to talk to Lisa and Jisoo Unnie but I…I didn’t…couldn’t”  
“It’s fine. Its harder opening up to those closer to you. Take your time.” Nayeon smiled “Meanwhile you have me to talk to. I’m always here for you. I can help you get over Jennie. Like I said I have been in your place and trust me if someone you like doesn’t like you back the sooner you get over them the easier it is for you. I’ll help you all you want”  
Rosé smiled the brightest she had in weeks “Thanks Unnie. I owe you one”  
“No you don’t. You are one of the most caring and loving friends I have ever had. I just want you to be happy”   
Just then Nayeon’s phone buzzed “Now let’s get you freshened up so I can take you back to Lisa. She has been texting me non-stop from last night”


	7. Chapter 6

‘Our love is six feet under, I can’t help but wonder if our grave was watered by the rain… Would roses bloom? Could roses bloom again?’

 

It was almost noon by the time Nayeon dropped Rosé off at the Blackpink dorm

“Are you sure you don’t want to come in?” Rosé asked getting out of the car.

“No I’d rather not be late for lunch or my members will kill me” Nayeon laughed “But do give my regards to your members” Nayeon pulled Rosé in for a hug ”And remember whatever I told you.”

“I will. Thanks for everything” Rosé bid her friend goodbye and went back into the dorm rubbing her forehead. The pill hadn’t helped her hangover much .As she walked into the dorm she immediately wondered if her members had all gone out since it was so quiet but her doubts were soon erased as she walked into her room and found Lisa sitting on her bed.

“Hey Lisa” Chaeyoung smiled at the maknae.

“Oh hey” Lisa said without looking up at.

“Lisa? What’s wrong?” Rosé asked sitting beside Lisa on the bed who continued to ignore her. 

“Yah Lisa-yah why are you acting so childish? Just tell me what’s wrong?” she took Lisa’s arm but to her surprise the younger girl yanked her arm away angrily.

“Lisa…” Rosé was scared now

Lisa met her eyes with a fierce gaze “I don’t know Chaeyoung, you tell me”

“I don’t understand” For a second Rosé was afraid that Lisa had found out about the past night. Maybe she still had the whiskey on hear breath, but what Lisa did next clarified for her that Lisa didn’t know about that. She knew about something worse.

“Lisa…” Chaeyoung’s lips shivered as she looked at the tissue paper in Lisa’s hands “Lisa I…”

“You left your jacket at practise yesterday. I borrowed it since I hadn’t carried mine” Lisa said softly

Chaeyoung looked at the tissue paper on which she had poured out all her feelings about Jennie, in Lisa’s hand. 

“Who is this about?”Lisa asked softly

“No one Lisa”

“Who hurt you?” Lisa raised her voice slightly

“Lisa no one hurt me” Rosé was taken aback by her

Lisa looked at Rosé with pain in her eyes “I thought we were best friends. I thought we share everything. But no I guess not!”

“Lisa! Why are you acting like this all of a sudden?” Rosé’s voice cracked. She and Lisa bickered often but this was something else.

“Because you changed bloody hell!” Lisa teared up “You changed! Things changed so much! You think I can’t see how sad you have been since your holiday with Jennie Unnie! Do you think I can’t see both of you not being able to look into each other’s eyes let alone exchange any words. Do you think I don’t see the pain in your eyes”

Rosé looked away.

“You are my closest friend. I care a lot about you I don’t like seeing you like this. You won’t tell me what’s going on. Jennie unnie won’t tell me what happened. I can’t take it. I can’t take you both acting like the other doesn’t exist. I can’t watch that pain in your eyes anymore.” Lisa began crying making Chaeyoung immediately reach out to hug her.

“Lisa I…” Chaeyoung was having difficulty saying anything now.

“This is about Jennie Unnie. Isn’t it?” Lisa demanded an answer angrily through her tears.

Rosé was surprised “How did you know?”

“Please” Lisa sobbed “We have known since the trainee days. It has been so obvious that you have a massive crush on her.”

Chaeyoung looked away with guilt “Oh”

“You could have told me earlier you know.”

“I’m sorry Lisa. I didn’t mean to hurt you”

“I used to think I was your best friend. But I don’t think I am since you don’t feel comfortable sharing anything with me” Lisa wiped her tears.

“Lisa! It’s not like that. Trust me. I was…I was afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” Lisa interrupted.

“I was afraid of telling anyone about my feelings. I didn’t know how you would react. I didn’t know how I felt. And after everything that happened I felt ashamed”

“Ashamed? Why?”

“I ruined my friendship. Mine and Jennie Unnie’s and clearly its affecting the whole group”

“So what happened?” Lisa asked holding up the tissue paper “Don’t say nothing because it’s so obvious something did”

“I kissed her Lisa” Chaeyoung blurted out then teared up “I kissed her. We fell on each other I couldn’t control my feelings so I kissed her but it was a mistake” Chaeyoung started crying

Lisa sat in shock as she continued “That night she told me it wasn’t a big deal. I got offended and revealed all my feelings to her. But she…but she doesn’t love me back and I don’t know what to do” Rosé continued crying as Lisa wrapped her in her arms.

“Chipmunk…” Lisa tightening the hug around the older girl as she cried her heart out. “I’m sorry”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you Lisa. I was afraid” she cried on shoulder who was gently stroking her back “I wanted to tell you for so long”

“It’s ok I understand. I’m sorry I got upset. I was just so frustrated because you were both so sad all the time and no one was telling me what was happening. I didn’t like seeing us fall apart like this” Lisa said comforting her crying friend who nodded “I am sorry to have caused this” Rosé said sadly.

“Lisa, what do I do?” Rosé asked holding back tears as Lisa stroked her hair

“She said she didn’t like you back?” Lisa asked softly

“She did.” Rosé said

“You have to move on. You have liked her for years Park Chaeyoung but she doesn’t like you back. Move on over her or it’s going to hurt even worse”

Rosé nodded “I know .I’ll try”

“Good chipmunk” Lisa smiled “Keep yourself busy. Spend more time with me and Jisoo unnie. And also stop ignoring Jennie Unnie. You can be distant for sometime but don’t shut her out. She may not love you like that but she loves you as a friend. And I miss us four”

“Ok” Rosé nodded hugging Lisa again “I’m sorry. You are an amazing friend Lisa I should been honest with you”

“Yes please” Lisa wiped away her tears “And don’t you ever hide your sadness from me again. Or I’ll be very angry” Lisa made an angry face making Chaeyoung laugh. “Ok I’m sorry”

“Good” Lisa held her. They stayed like that in each other’s arms with their eyes closed for a minute after which Lisa broke the silence “By the way. You aren’t the only one who had her first kiss this month”

Rosé’s eyes flew open as she looked at Lisa “What! Who?”

“You are not the only one who has had a crush on one of our Unnies”

Rosé grabbed Lisa’s arm “Manoban! Don’t tell me that you and Jisoo Unnie”

Lisa nodded making Rosé squeal and hug her tightly ‘I’m so happy for you!”

“Easy, easy. I can’t breathe”

“So are you guys together!?”

Lisa laughed at the girl’s enthusiasm “We are still figuring it out but more or less yes. I was planning on telling you but since it wasn’t official and a little complicated I didn’t. But now things are getting sorted.”

“Oh my god that’s amazing” Rosé giggled “Now it’s you keeping secrets!”

“Like I said it was complicated. And it’s not like I was very sad or hurting. I was happy”

“Wish I had such good luck” Rosé looked sad

“Hey! You do have good luck! You just have to wait a little longer. I’m sure you will find yourself a caring girlfriend or boyfriend, whatever you want, and they will keep you very happy! They better or I won’t let them near you.” Lisa said making Rosé laugh “I’m serious. I only want the best for you!”

Rosé smiled placing her head on Lisa’s shoulder “You are an amazing girl who deserves a fairytale romance. You deserve love and you will find love. So don’t you be sad anymore” Rosé had tears of happiness in her eyes now after what Lisa just said 

“Lisa you are the best. I am blessed to have a friend like you”

“I know!” Lisa smirked and relaxed into her best friend’s embrace 

 

•••

 

Sitting on a table for two at their favorite coffee shop, the two unnies settled themselves in sipping their favorite drinks. They left their dorm thirty minutes ago leaving their maknae alone. It was supposed to be the three of them leaving but Lisa chose to stay in case Chaeyoung arrives.

Jennie's sipping her Vanilla Bean frappe looking at the busy street outside the café when Jisoo spoke "You seem to be in a very deep thinking, Jendeuk."

Jennie turned her gaze to Jisoo "I'm not unnie"

"Well, you sure are to me." Jisoo said confidently. "If something's bothering you, you know you can always share it to me Jen. I am always here to listen."

The younger girl let out a deep sigh "Unnie, have you ever felt like being confused because something unusual happened?"

"What do you mean, Jen? I don't quiet get you." Jisoo asked confusingly.

"Uhm how should I say this...well...I"

"Is this about Chaeyoung?" Jisoo said with conviction not letting the younger girl finish her sentence.

"Well..." the younger girl nodded and said "yes"

"What happened during your vacation? Lisa and I are so worried for the both of you."

"Uhm unnie, will you promise me not to freak out?" 

Jisoo sipped from her Java Chip frappe and then looked at the girl in front of her "I can't promise Jen. You tell me first."

"Ro-Rosé and I uhm...we kissed." Jennie said hesitatingly waiting for the older girl's response.

"Is that all?" Jisoo said without showing any emotions.

"Aren't you gonna freak out?" the younger girl asked in shocked.

"Argh Jendeuk, you're confusing me." the older girl face-palmed "You said not to freak out and now you’re asking me that." Jisoo playfully said showing her dramatic skills.

"But you're not supposed to react like that. You make it seem like it is normal to you." Jennie whined making Jisoo chuckled.

"It is normal Jendeuk. You kiss your friends on their cheek." Jisoo said taking long sip from her drink.

"It's not a normal kiss. We kissed on the lips." Jennie shyly said making Jisoo to spit her drink out of her mouth.

"WHAT?! Am I hearing it right Jendeuk?" the older girl asked not trying to believe what the younger girl said only to receive a shy nod.

"I knew you'd freak out." the younger girl whispered but enough for Jisoo to hear.

"Wha...how did that happened?" Jisoo asked aggressively.

Jennie then told her unnie everything that happened from the very beginning until when they went back home to their dorm.

"I knew something's wrong with Chaeng. I knew it!" Jisoo exclaimed loud enough to disturb other people which made the other customers look at her judgmentally. Jennie bowed apologizing those were disturbed by her friend’s sudden excitement.

 

“Unnie, can you lower down your voice. You’re disturbing other people you know.” The younger girl warned Jisoo.

“Hmm who cares about them? They don’t own this place.” The older girl said rolling her eyes upward and then looked at the girl in front of her dreamily “What happened next? Did you say you love her too?”

“What? No!” Jennie exclaimed making the customers to look at them again and hushed them to be quiet. Jisoo rolled her eyes for the second time before looking back at her friend expecting for more details “I mean, I love her but not like that unnie. I don't think I love her. Actually, I don't know how I feel.” The younger girl added.

Jisoo looked intently at the younger girl observing her expressions “So you broke her heart?”

Taken aback, Jennie looked at Jisoo and nodded “But it wasn’t my intention unnie.”

“Maybe but you somehow gave her the idea that you also feel the same for kissing her back which you aren’t supposed to do because you have no feelings for her.”

Jennie may not be that person to admit that her friend is right but Jisoo has a point. It shouldn’t end up like this if she didn’t kissed Rosé back in the first place.

“What should I do unnie?” Jennie face-palmed frustratingly. “I don’t want to lose Rosé. I can’t lose her.”

Jisoo sipped from her drink “She did say that she wants to be alone right? Well, that obviously means that you should stay away from her for now. I’m not saying that you should ignore her forever but I think you should not bother her at the moment. Give her space, Jendeuk. Our little Chaeyoung will come back eventually.”

The younger girl sighed “I guess you’re right, unnie. I’ll give her space for now. Yeah, that should what I do.”

Jisoo nodded.

 

Both girls were busy finishing their own drinks when Jisoo broke the silence.

“I have to tell you something though.”

Jennie looked curiously at the older girl “What is it?”

“Well, since you shared something to me, I guess it’s fair if I’ll share something to you too.” Jisoo sincerely said.

“You’re making me nervous, unnie. What is it about?”

“It’s about Lisa and I.” the older girl said not even showing any signs of hesitations.

“What is with you and Lisa?”

“She went home to Thailand with me and my family, right?” Jennie nodded making the older girl continue “Well, we had so much fun during our stay there. I met her extended family and I swear that they are so amazing. I still get to showcase my bar tending skills in front them and my family, of course with the guidance of Lisa’s chef dad. I can really say that her whole family is amazing. I like to live there someday.” Jisoo said dreamily.

“Uhm unnie, how is this related to you and Lisa? I mean, I thought you’re going to tell me something interesting which is the reason why you said you wanted to be fair.”

“Aish! It was just an introduction, Jendeuk. You know, every story has its prologue right? So learn to be patient.” Jisoo shook her head.

Jennie chuckled at her friend’s antics “Alright, I’ll be patient. You may now continue.”

“Well since you’re so impatient, I’m just go jump to the best part.” The older girl said making Jennie to get excited.

“What is it, unnie?” Jennie asked before sipping from her drink.

“Lisa and I kissed.” Jisoo proudly said.

Jennie spat out her drink from her mouth. “What?!”

“I said we kissed.” Jisoo said with a smile on her face.

“Wait, so what are you now? I mean are you two dating?” Jennie asked shockingly which made Jisoo nod. “But why didn’t you tell me? I thought we’re best friends and best friends share secrets.” She added.

Jisoo smirked “Wow! Coming from you Jendeuk?”

“But unnie, mine was very complicated.” Jennie whined.

“Bold of you to assume that mine wasn’t complicated too.”

“Well, you seem happy now.” The younger girl said sincerely

 

“Because I really am. Whatever circumstances Lisa and I faced, we were able to surpass it. Look at us now? We remain unbothered and unproblematic.” Jisoo said smugly.

"I'm genuinely happy for you and Lisa, Jisoo-unnie." Jennie smiled "I wish I could get closer to my own happiness too." she added with a sigh.

"Don't worry Jen, your happiness will come to you when you least expect it. Just be patient, okay?" Jisoo advised making Jennie smiled.

Several minutes later talking about everything under the sun, the girls received a notification - a message from their group chat.

Jisoo didn't bother to open the message after knowing that it wasn't from Lisa and just asked the younger girl sitting in front of her "It's been a while since we've used that group chat. Who was it, Jen?"

Jennie looked up from her phone to look at the older girl and answered her with a wide smile showing her gums "It's from Irene unnie."

 

***

 

Chaeyoung and Lisa were watching Disney animated movies inside the latter girl's room after their emotional talk awhile ago when their phones suddenly lit up. Lisa's full attention was on the movie that she wasn't able to notice that she just received a message. Rosé, on the other hand, was too preoccupied that she could not even understand what the movie is all about making her to grab her phone and opened the message.

 

Big 3 Bosses

Joohyunie: Girls! I'm back!  
Where you at?  
Let's meet up!  
I also have an announcement to make.  
See y'all!!

 

Reading the message made Rosé's heart beat faster than the usual. "This can't be." she thought to herself "She can't be back" she added.

Now that Irene's back, Rosé remembered how one of their members were so whipped for the older girl.

 

"Unnie,what's up with you? You've been on your phone all day, you're not usually like that. And what's with up with those smiles? You're not that smiley every time you read a joke online." a teenage Chaeyoung asked Jennie.

Jennie transferred her gaze from her phone to the younger girl "Chaeyoung-ah, do you remember that girl I mentioned the last time? The one who I met at the salon?" Rosé nodded making the older girl smiled widely "Did I forgot to mention that I asked for her number?"

Chaeyoung was dumbfounded. She did not expect to see the older girl to be this all giddy about another person, especially with a girl. "You asked for it?"

The older girl nodded "Uhuh! I told her I want to get close to her so she gave her number immediately." Jennie said dreamily "and guess what?"

"What?"

"I already know her name!" Jennie screamed loudly making her dog, Kai, barked "Oops, sorry Kai"

"Uhm that's good to know. So what's her name?" Rosé asked despite the heavy feeling in her heart.

"Her name is Bae Joohyun but she prefers to be called Irene." the older girl said showing her gummy smile.

"So uh wh-what is she like?"

"She's so pretty, Chaeng! Like really, really pretty. At first you may think that she's cold and unapproachable but once you get to know her, she’s the nicest person you would ever meet. She's a trainee from SM Entertainment and she's debuting soon. She's so talented - she can dance, she can sing and she can rap too. And did I mentioned that she's super pretty? I really can't believe that I have met someone as perfect as her, Chaeng. She's...."

Rosé could no longer understand what the older girl was saying. It's like her mind has stopped working. All she could only feel was her heart being broken in to tiny pieces. And all she could ever do is to act and pretend that she's happy for the older girl when in reality, her heart is dying.

 

"Chipmunk, are you okay? You were spacing out." Rosé went back to reality when she heard her best friend speak.

"Ah yes, I'm okay Lisa." she smiled "Can I go out for a minute? I'm just gonna call someone." she added making Lisa nod.

"Can you bring some snacks when you get back, please." the maknae asked without looking at the older girl.

"Sure"

Rosé then walked out of Lisa's room and went inside her room. She dialed Nayeon's number as she remembered what the older girl has said after before she left to go back to her dorm.

 

"Rosé-ah, I know someone. She's just got out from a toxic relationship. If you want then I can introduce you to her." Nayeon said while waiting for the traffic light to go green as they were stuck in the traffic. "Look, I'm not asking you to date someone just because your heartbroken but it's up to you Chaeng. It's up to you if you want to stay miserable or you're going to give your heart a break. Your choice, Change. Your choice."

Rosé smiled "Thanks, unnie. I'll think about it."

 

Rosé dialed Nayeon's number and on the third ring, the older girl answered.

"Hey Chaeyoung-ah! Did you forget something here?" Nayeon answered enthusiastically.

 

 

"Unnie, does your offer still stands?"


End file.
